Nissan GT-R Interceptor: To Serve and Protect Fantasy Land

It is Rumored that the Emirates will Also Have Asimo Direct Traffic.

(Image Credits: Autocar Online) 

There is something slightly nerdy about the Nissan GT-R. Maybe it's the PS3-style computer interface (developed with the erstwhile nerds at Polyphony Digital, creators of Gran Turismo). Maybe it's the super-complicated way in which it does everything. The GT-R does have the latest version of Nissan's all-wheel drive system, a seven-speed DSG with driver-selected shift speeds, variable dampers,and more electronic driver aids than an Airbus A380. Maybe it's just the fact that it's a Nissan. The last seems the most likely.

But this morning we have awoken to a new world: the GT-R is seriously cool. The forward-thinking, ever-practical folks down in Abu Dhabi have taken delivery of a GT-R police interceptor. Everything about this makes sense. Think about it. The GT-R is a huge car, but it is also hugely fast. Ergo, it is a sleeper. All those driver aids mean that it will be easier to keep under control while making one of those Wildest Police Video style high-speed chases. Finally, and most importantly, this is Abu Dhabi. It is--perhaps superceded only by neighbor Dubai--the closest thing to a real-life Fantasy Land as there is on Earth. And in Fantasy Land, the GT-R makes a perfect police car.

Mercedes Decides that Everyone Else was Wrong

"And After I 'ave Invaded Russia, I will do Something Equally as Pointless and Mindless: Start a Factory F1 Team" - Napoleon Bonaparte

(Image Credits: kids-learn.org) 

As I burn the midnight oil, glacially wearing away at the excitement that is my PhD, I'm glad that I can find future fellow sufferers in futility in the world's automakers. Today's candidate: Mercedes-Benz. It seems that while Toyota, BMW and, eventually, Renault are sailing into the undying lands of F1, Mercedes thinks the time is right for a factory team. History proves that it is best to learn why others have failed before treading their path. Shockingly, no one has successfully done this when it comes to invading Russia (never in the winter, people!). Perhaps, Mercedes has been broodingly watching the other manufacturers bow out--especially arch-rival BMW--and thinks that it has twigged what they got wrong. Personally, I think it is much simpler: hubris. Mercedes has won all of its championships with a "McLaren-" prefix. Now, with the cash-strapped (yet brain flush) Brawn GP team as the factory outfit, Mercedes is set to make a run on the top step all by itself; albeit without the services of current World Champion, Jenson Button. Why else would you break up one of the most successful sports partnerships since Jimmy MacElroy and Chazz Michael Michaels? Who knows. Maybe Mercedes can do what BMW, Toyota, Jaguar, and Honda couldn't do. It all feels too much like history repeating.

Italian Car + Turbocharger = Insult + ...?

Ferrari Says It's Turbo Time. Yikes.

(Image Credits: www.cincity2000.com)

Let's be real honest about something: it is possible to have too much of a good thing. Eat too much chocolate and you'll get fat. Drink too much and you'll either create a hurricane of vomit or end up in the hospital. Create a car with too much power and... well...

That is why the reports coming out that Ferrari is planning to turbocharge its engines in the future are so alarming. It's not that the Prancing Horse badge hasn't had breathing assistance in the past. The Autoblog article rightfully points out that the old F40 was a blown-V8. However, everyone had turbochargers back in the 1980s; even the Plymouth Voyager. Turbochargers were like fringed bangs, mullets, and shoulder pads; everyone had them, but not everyone was sure why.

A momentary interruption to our normally scheduled rant as we present material that

MAY CONTAIN ENGINEERING LIKE SUBSTANCE

Turbocharging: A Simple Primer

The benefits of turbocharging are simple: take a smaller, more efficient engine, strap on a vacuum, and get the power of a much larger engine when you want it. Simple, effective. This power boost is made possible by forcing more air into the combustion chamber; more air means more oxygen to react with fuel; more reaction means more power. Superchargers work in a similar fashion--ramming air into cylinders--however, they have the downside of being belt-driven; that is, it takes some of the power that you are making to run the supercharger. Not so, the turbocharger.
Hot exhaust gases created from combustion leave the cylinder and rapidly expand down the exhaust pipe at high velocity. This volume change is wasted in normal (or, to use engine parlance, normally aspirated) engines. However, by placing a turbine (turbo, get it?) upstream of the cylinder, it is possible to take advantage of this expansion and power a compressor off the same shaft as the turbine with a much smaller penalty paid in lost engine power. Turbochargers are lithe devices that operate at extremely high speeds and temperatures making them some of the most advanced, and fragile, systems in place on cars today. Despite their lightweight, though,  turbochargers still require time to accelerate to operational speed; enter the dreaded turbo lag.
What is turbo lag? Well, when you put the foot down in your normally aspirated car you get what engineers refer to as a "linear" response. The more that you put your foot down, the more acceleration that you perceive. This tends to progress in a very natural and expected fashion; the further your foot goes down, the faster the car goes, by proportion. Whether or not this is in fact linear is inconsequential. Now put a turbocharger onto the engine. Rather than increasing proportionally with throttle opening, the amount of air entering the engine with increasing engine speed is in fact exponential. The faster a turbocharger runs, the more air that it will pull into the cylinder, further accelerating the turbocharger. To get this reinforcing feedback, though, requires the engine to be running at sufficient speed to generate enough exhaust gases to be expanding fast enough down the cylinder to power the turbocharger. Furthermore, turbocharging allows the carmaker to use a smaller engine than they otherwise would. A small engine with no boost is not a very powerful engine. Yet, when the turbocharger reaches operating speed, the power will not come on gradually. Instead, it often slams home with frightening effect. Driving an unfamiliar turbocharged car can be a harrowing experience. The effect of turbo lag is exacerbated by having larger turbochargers; obviously, larger turbines mean larger inertia, mean more torque required for the same acceleration (thanks, Mr. Newton).

There have been several attempts over the years to mitigate --note, no one has ever claimed to be solving or to have solved the problem of turbo lag before the gents in Maranello -- the effects of turbo lag. The Supra Mk V had what are called "sequential" turbochargers. On these engines, a smaller turbo is placed in series with a larger one. At lower engine speeds, the smaller turbo "spools up" faster, giving boost at the low end. By the time the smaller turbo has reached its maximum operational velocity (at which point it produces no more boost pressure) the larger turbo is, theoretically, reaching its operating point; picking up where the little guy left off. This requires a very testy and time consuming development process. The two turbochargers must be sized properly such that one gives way to the other in a seamless fashion across a broad range of engine speeds. Rally cars have utilized "anti-lag systems" for years. For these systems, air from the intake side is admitted to the exhaust to keep the turbo spinning at a higher speed than if it were simply allowed to "stage down." Finally, VW has taken the novel approach of using both a supercharger and a turbocharger in what it calls a "twincharging" system. Despite initial expectations--and having driven one--I can say that the engine is marvelous. It delivers fantastic power down low and keeps on the boost well into the higher reaches of the tachometer. Even more impressively, it makes 160HP feel like all you will ever need, with the right 6-speed transmission, of course.

END TECHNICAL BANTER

With all this technology currently available, I really do wonder what Ferrari could be cooking up. They are masters of style, yes. Masters of advanced technology and innovative solutions to long-standing problems in automotive design? Not hardly. Back in the 1980s, automakers were putting turbochargers onto cars to get ghastly amounts of horsepower from engines that could barely handle it. Unsurprisingly, pressurizing an engine occasionally led to detonation. Today's computer-controlled engine management systems are vastly improved over their great-granddaddies from the "Me" decade, but they can't stop an over exuberant driver from spending a bit too long with the "go" pedal down a few too many times. Ferrari drivers are not known for restraint.
It will be necessary for Ferrari to increase their average fuel consumption if they intend to continue selling cars in California (see the marvelously ludicrous rumored Ferrari hybrid). Yet, I remain unconvinced. A turbocharged Ferrari has all the appeal of a monkey strapped to a stick of dynamite. He might be fun for awhile, but at some point he's going to bite you... or explode.

Ford: Back in Black

Like You Know Who, Ford is Back in the Black

(Image Credits: arcona.files.wordpress.com)

After reporting last week that Ford will cease being irrational and start selling the European-market Focus in the United States, I was literally beside myself with joy when I read that Ford has just turned over $1bn in profit in the third quarter. This is easily one of the greatest return from death stories since Lazarus walked out of the tomb or Neil Patrick Harris got a hit show again. Okay, maybe Doogie isn't back, but Ford has all the marks of a patient set to make a full recovery.
Like many headlines drawn from statistics, the devil is in the details. Yes, Ford has brought in more than it spent. However, it still has serious debts issues and will need to renegotiate with the UAW to be competitive with GM and Chrysler LLC in the long run. Also, Ford saying that it will be "solidly profitable in 2011" is as meaningless as worthless as the Zimbabwean dollar. If everything stays as it is right now (here's an insider tip: it won't) then Ford will be fully in the black. Something tells me there are some potholes and an injury or two up the road. All the same, let's celebrate the first solid application of polish to what had been one of the more tarnished names in the automotive field. Ford is proof positive that when a business is actually managed, rather than simply taken advantage of and its capital reserves of history squandered, it will succeed. Funny thing, that.

Ford Focus: Signs of Intelligent Life in the Automotive Universe

One World. One Focus.

(Image Credits: Autocar Magazine Online)

The FI faithful will be familiar with the fact that Ford is a favorite tackling dummy of mine. I have written a couple of times times (at least) in the past about how, inexplicably, Ford wanted to sell two different versions of the Focus; one for the American market, and one for the European market. Granted, Europeans, particularly the British, have different tastes. But if a car is such a dynamite success, why mess with the formula? It's at best patronizing, at worst insulting, to suggest that American tastes run so different to European ones that an entirely different version of the same car is necessary. It's not like "good driving dynamics" and "highly efficient powertrains" don't translate.
Well, Ford has pulled the soapbox from underneath me. SETI can stop directing its antennas at Detroit because we've found sentience. There will be one Focus in the next generation; it will return to being a "world car." Let's applaud a sensible business decision from a company that, despite the competition, has made a series of them. Not to lay too much pressure on "the little Focus that could," but this could be exactly the sort of decision that pushes Ford back to the forefront. It could bring the world closer together, make trees dance, and squirrels sing. Okay, maybe it was just a good move.

The Lotus Scura: Lord Vader, Your Car is Ready

Luke and Leia's Half-Brother is a Lotus. This One is a Bad Guy, Though.

(Image Credits: Twentieth Century Fox)

Many cars come close to being villainous. There's the Hummer H2, that ponderous, panda-killing enemy of the planet. Then there is the Maybach 62; a car that practically screams "bailout bonus." Or what about the AMG Black Series cars? These are, of course, cars so dangerous that Mercedes sells each one with a "parental advisory warning" (scroll to the video at the bottom of the page. For non-UK, see here). All of these cars, though, are choir boys compared to a car so evil, so devilishly cool, and from somewhere wonderfully unexpected: Lotus.

I know what you're thinking: Lotus makes cars that punch above their weight performance-wise, but they always tend to be a bit dorky or just downright effeminate. But check out the new Lotus Scura. It looks like the unholy offspring of a Lotus Exige (of which it is a special edition) and Darth Vader's helmet. What's even more delightfully sinful is that matte black paint scheme that makes the car a poor man's Reventón. With the new Evora out, it's nice to see the Exige being freshened. Even if it is the only sports car seeking to wield total control of the galaxy.

The New Porsche Turbo: The Nerdy Supercar

As Reliable as a Labrador. As Fast as Angelic Flatulence. As Efficient as German Public Transport.

(Image Credits: Autocar Magazine Online)

Is it wrong to want a Porsche Turbo? Is it somehow boring or mundane? Although there is a vast swathe of performance metal available on the market (more now than at any other point in the history of the automobile), gearheads can be divided into two camps: those that would own a Porsche 911, and those who never would. It is such a polarizing car, and it has had nearly four decades worth of engineering refinement to heighten the debate. I personally have long lived in the camp that finds them boring, unoriginal, and too common for someone who actually likes cars. However. the more I see the Porsche Turbo, with its classic lines and rear track as wider than Shaq's wingspan, the more I realize how deeply desirable it is. It is, for all intents and purposes, an executive jet for the road. All comfort, all luxury, all performance, all business. And now, there's a new one.
The video is hilarious. Compare the Porsche Turbo video with this Ferrari 458 trailer and you'll see what I mean. On one hand, unbridled (ha ha) Italian exuberance. On the other, calm, reserved, German efficiency. Powerslides and pumping music versus...well, a nerdy guy with an unpronounceable last names extolling the virtues of variable stiffness engine mounts. How many times does he have to say it's "efficient" anyway? But it's then that you realize what a compliment that that is. To an Italian, nothing could be more central to the essence of life than passion and emotion; that is why Ferrari is so consummately Italian. And to a German, there can be nothing of greater value than efficiency and reliability; and that is why Porsche makes the best damn sports cars. Period.

Waste Not?

The Only Clunk Heard Was That of My Head Striking the Desk
(Image Credits: Autocar Magazine Online)

The fact that I have no love lost for the Cash for Clunkers scheme is not news on this blog. Richard Bremner's latest in Autocar magazine, though, really drives the point home. Have a glance through the gallery at the twisted priorities of Western consumerism. Perfectly good cars traded in on a whim for something shinier, more satisfying(?), but certainly unnecessary. Admittedly--or rather, hopefully--these cars are outliers of an otherwise successful effort to get oil-burning rust-buckets off the street. But is it at all surprising that people used this scheme as an excuse to just get a new car? We do it with other consumer items, as well. Take for example, the iPod. Sure, it might be frustrating if the batter doesn't hold a charge for days on end like it did new, but if it still is holding a charge for at least a day, let alone 12 hours, is that not good enough for it to still be useable? The cars in these pictures were not good as new; they were probably not even good as used. Yet, they were by no means ready for the scrapyard. Cars, quite unlike consumer electronics, are meant to be maintained. In past lean times, people would "make do" with what they had. Scrappage schemes are an affront to common sense; rather than encouraging people to make sensible purchases, or educating people on basic personal finance, governments are throwing money out for any old purchase. Sounds like giving a man a fish, if you know what I mean.

Progress Means Moving Forward

Richard Nixon's Resignation Speech Was Merely His Attempt at Being 'Transparent' About His 'Progress' Since the Watergate Scandal
(Image Credits: www.visitingdc.com)

In a recent update of Autocar Online, GM states that the Chevrolet Volt may not be commercially viable. To any casual follower of the auto industry this should come as little of a surprise. GM has not broken new ground since it came out with badge-engineering in the 1980's; and really that just made it easier for the executives since they could refer to their product as 'car' rather than 'cars.'
I really do feel for Fritz Henderson, however. The guy will have to respond apologetically to every polemical comment levied against GM thanks to Rick Wagoner's arrogant and shameful last stand. I do think that he should have better press people, though. While I admire GM's obvious desire to spin this as a positive by being 'transparent' and trying 'to keep the public informed of our progress,' this is not the sort of thing that one wants to be transparent about. And, frankly, how can this be interpreted as progress? If Mr. Henderson means that GM has made 'progress' in that it is no longer denying that it makes inferior product and that its competitors vastly outstrip its innovative capacity, well then kudos for GM making it past step 1. However, that seems far too existential a realization for GM at this stage.
GM is hoping that something bold, brash, and brilliant like the Volt will bring it back from the brink (apologies for the alliteration). The trouble with that line of thinking is that it is too much like banking on a home run to win the game; chances are, you're going to strike out. Any student of history knows that success in war requires steady, consistent, and unwavering progress, especially in the face of adversity. Let's all hope that GM is 'transparent' about some real 'progress' in the future.